nolesaint
Team Captain
Posts: 1,893
Dislikes:
|
Post by nolesaint on Apr 1, 2014 15:48:42 GMT -5
when Ryan Oliver searches for weapons of mass destruction, he finds them, in the mirror. Now there's a quote!
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Dislikes:
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2014 15:53:52 GMT -5
when Ryan Oliver searches for weapons of mass destruction, he finds them, in the mirror. Now there's a quote! That's old. It's one of the original Ryan Oliverisms.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Dislikes:
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2014 17:21:17 GMT -5
Let me see here. I can't remember all of the Legends of Ryan Oliver over the years as there are too many. I never tried to recap before. As a tribute to his recent awesomeness....Here are some of the ones from original threads.
-There was a time, a time before Siena became an NBA team. When the local MAAC team reigned supreme. When people complained about unfair homecourt advantages. This was an age when only men were allowed to wear a Saints uniform. And in Albany, one shooting guard who was more man than the rest. His name was Ryan Oliver. He was like a God walking amongst mere mortals. He had a jumpshot that could make a wolverine purr and suits so fine they made Sinatra look like a hobo. In other words, Ryan Oliver was the balls.
-Ryan Oliver doesn't always make his shots, but when he does, he scores points. He is the most interesting man in the MAAC. -Ryan Oliver once swam the English Channel feet first just to make it more convenient to kick a Frenchman's ass. During the winter, the swallows of Capistrano flock to see HIM. He IS the best player in the world. -When Ryan Oliver farts, there's a rainbow. -Ryan Oliver was the one who REALLY killed Osama Bin Laden. -When Ryan Oliver searches for Weapons of Mass Destruction, he always finds one,...in the mirror. -When Ryan Oliver shoots a jumper, an angel gets its wings. -Ryan Oliver invented sliced bread. -Ryan Oliver wrestles with alligators in his spare time just for fun. When he talks, his words are carved into monuments. He wears shorts lined with real gold. He IS the best player in the world. -Ryan Oliver invented the internet. -Ryan Oliver eats glass just to stay sharp. -Ryan Oliver is like the Michael Jordan of tennis.
-His poetic passes are so beautiful that they turn Sylvia Plath into an optimist. When he glides to the rim, his gracefulness calms wild animals. He IS the best player in the world. -David Laury calls getting a "C" a challenge. Ryan Oliver calls climbing Mt. Everest "Saturday." -Ryan Oliver could survive the zombie apocalypse with a paper mache sword. He swims laps in a pool filled with tiger sharks. When he does an interview, sonnets are written. Yeah, he's pretty good. -Ryan Oliver eats Red Foxes and poops Jaspers. He smells of greatness, and reeks of legend. His shots are trailed by rainbows and butterflies. You have no idea the cataclysm of awesomeness that's about to devastate the MAAC basketball world. -Ryan Oliver once killed a werewolf with a toothpick. -When Lindsey shoots threes, babies cry. When Ryan Oliver shoots threes, women orgasm.
-Ryan Oliver once stopped a terrorist attack in Nakatomi plaza in his bare feet. -Ryan Oliver could play on one leg, with weighted clothes and a blindfold on, all whilst fighting the war on terror and still outscore David Laury -Hercules is Ryan Oliver's bitch. -Ryan Oliver accomplishes the seemingly impossible everyday before breakfast. He kills vampires with darkness, wrestles grizzly bears and outruns cheetahs all whilst eating his bowl of captain crunch. He spits fire balls and sings heavenly ballads that bring even Saintly to tears. Nobody can hang with this man's stuff. Nobody.
-It has been foreseen by prophets that Ryan Oliver will unite alums and non-alums alike on December 21, 2012. -Ryan Oliver to slay nomar33 on 12/21/2012 thereby keeping the world safe once more. -Ryan Oliver says f%$@ the Mayans. -If Ryan Oliver invented the lightbulb, then Saintsfan invented poor punctuation. -Ryan Oliver once traveled to an Alien world, earned the respect of its people using a fake body he made from alien DNA, fell in love with the princess, fought for a world in peril, and then he killed space ships with a crude bow and arrow whilst riding a near mythological dragon thru the skies like the furious warrior for good that he is. This man is an unstoppable being of righteousness. -Ryan Oliver once won the Kentucky Derby on foot. When internet bloggers start threads about him, they never end. His best friend is a Yeti and he keeps a pet Sherpa. He is the greatest player in the world.
There's more. But they are all spread amongst the vastness of the interwebs.
|
|
siena79
Freshman
Posts: 260
Dislikes:
|
Post by siena79 on Apr 1, 2014 17:59:49 GMT -5
Wow, this is hilarious! Thanks for the laughs!
|
|
q02
Team Manager
Posts: 73
Dislikes:
|
Post by q02 on Apr 1, 2014 18:14:54 GMT -5
KK that was funny!!!
|
|
Matilda
Ball Boy
Posts: 1
Dislikes:
|
Post by Matilda on Apr 1, 2014 20:11:14 GMT -5
KK best laugh in awhile!
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Dislikes:
|
Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2014 20:25:55 GMT -5
-When Ryan Oliver shoots a jumper, an angel gets its wings. When I wrote this 2 years ago, I never could have imagined it would actually happen. #SeeingIsBelieving
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Dislikes:
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 28, 2016 22:47:32 GMT -5
Happy Senior Night.
I've always liked both Imoh Silas and Ryan Oliver. They are class acts and have always been well spoken. They have always represented Siena well. Oliver, especially, has always been really personable in interviews.
I'm glad Oliver was able to find his niche in the program over the last few years...even with all the demands on his time like slaying demons, wrestling minotaurs, and knitting high quality hand towels.
He really does it all.
|
|
olddave
Team Captain
Posts: 2,665
Dislikes:
|
Post by olddave on Feb 28, 2016 22:51:40 GMT -5
Happy Senior Night. I've always liked both Imoh Silas and Ryan Oliver. They are class acts and have always been well spoken. They have always represented Siena well. Oliver, especially, has always been really personable in interviews. I'm glad Oliver was able to find his niche in the program over the last few years...even with all the demands on his time like slaying demons, wrestling minotaurs, a knitting high quality hand towels. He really does it all. Well said. Out of controversy to have 2 out of 4 pretty good seasons for both. Most,college players would love to have what they have had. And yes class acts.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Dislikes:
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 29, 2016 6:42:45 GMT -5
The best is yet to come....
When Ryan Oliver stops playing, the true human cause of global warming will be identified as a new ice age begins Ryan Oliver is the best player in the world.
|
|
mjs72
Junior
Posts: 973
Dislikes:
|
Post by mjs72 on Feb 29, 2016 7:00:33 GMT -5
Ryan Oliver can predict the future. Upon graduation he will join HBO to host his show, "Next Week With Ryan Oliver"
|
|
glen
Team Captain
Posts: 1,849
Dislikes:
|
Post by glen on Feb 29, 2016 7:18:48 GMT -5
I'd like to add that although Ryan gets accolades for perimeter shooting I've noticed that in tight end of game situations he's also the one who grabs HUGE rebounds. The kid is generally in the right place at the right time.
|
|
|
Post by greenblood on Feb 29, 2016 12:28:49 GMT -5
KK his favorite is the one of his head on Superman's cartoon body. I can't locate that one and he has the printed copy.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Dislikes:
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 29, 2016 12:40:34 GMT -5
KK his favorite is the one of his head on Superman's cartoon body. I can't locate that one and he has the printed copy. Ha. I think I still have that image somewhere on my home computer.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
Dislikes:
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 29, 2016 23:07:23 GMT -5
|
|